Joke Corner!! add your jokes here

An elderly Irishman lay dying on his bed.
While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled
the aroma of his favourite cheese scones wafting up the stairs.


He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed.
leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom
and, with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands, he
crawled downstairs.


With laboured breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into
the kitchen.
Were it not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already
in heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table,
were dozens of his favourite scones.


Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted Irish wife of
sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?


Mustering one great effort, he threw himself towards the table,
landing on his knees in a rumpled posture.
His parched lips parted.

He could almost taste the cheese scone before it was in his mouth,
seemingly bringing him back to life.


The aged and withered hand trembled on its way to the nearest scone
at the edge of the table, when his hand was suddenly smacked with a
spatula by his wife..................................................

F**k off" She said, "They're for the funeral"

Iraqi man walking along the beach when he finds a dirty lamp in the sand,
He gives it a rub to clean it and i genie pops out.....

Genie says " you can have 3 wishes, but every wish you have all americans will have double what you wish"

Iraqi has 1st wish and he wishes for $1,000,000 - Poof he gets it but every american gets $2,000,000.

2nd wish, he wishes for a fast car - Poof he gets it but every american get 2 fast cars.

3rd wish, he turns to genie and says " i've always wanted to donate a kidney.........."


Lame i know but its all i could think of.

Last News: After the "Exorcist" where a young mother calls a priest to put the devil off her doughter, it has been announced the "Exorcist II" where a young mother calls the devil to put the priest off his son"

Why the church is against condoms??? Jesus never talked about condoms. Only once he said that they break just too easily. When u have anal sex.

Why men ejaculate with releases (in bursts)? because women swallow to sips